Raising a Human - Part 1
For me, the most important think about being a parent is that I have the power to make someone’s life amazing. Not by providing luxury and lots of toys. But by shaping the little mind in a way that it’s forever happy and self-sufficient.
Take It Easy, It’s Intuitive, Right?
It's incredible how little we know about kids. Most of us know more about dogs than kids. There are shows in TV about everything - except for raising kids. It's really strange because I can imagine only a very few topics that are as important as raising a kid - if you want you and your kid to be happy. Maybe because it's not cool. Oh yes, I used to think that having kids wasn't cool and certainly it wasn't anything challenging or requiring any knowledge.
I used to think that I didn't need to know anything special. It's a kid, a baby! What could you learn about them? They should learn about our world, not me, right? Haha, I was so wrong. Of course we can raise babies without any special knowledge - many people do it like that. It’s like carrying water in you hands. Possible. But when you find a jug or even better a hose and system of pipes, the results are usually better and it’s certainly less frustrating.
Here is a list of some books that I've read and found useful. I have read many more, but they didn’t leave such a great impression on me so I’m listing only a few. If you find that my view on raising/surviving kids is similar to yours, maybe you will find the list inspiring.
In general, I definitely raise her with respect, love and trust. She teaches me so much about myself. I set firm limits for important things like safety, respect of others, screen time rules etc. And I often feel terrible for the mistakes that I make, and insecure and unsure if I’m doing the right things. And that’s part of the lesson I guess. We’re all learning.
How to Get the Baby Out
Yeah, let’s go straight to the point. I think that this is actually one of the first big realisations of any woman expecting a baby. How the hell am I going to get the baby out of me?!
Yep, scary. We all know the screaming scenes from movies... It's up to you, how to do it - I decided to forget about mainstream movies and watched this one: https://www.orgasmicbirth.com/. There are couple of others (google "movies natural birth" for example).
Does pain of natural birth it sound scary? It's scientifically proven (and I can confirm from my experience) - if you let your body work, it will produce all the "drugs" that you need. You only need modern medical approach if there is some serious issue or if you are scared. If you don't get scared or panic, there is nothing to be scared about. Really.
Please do your research and decide. There is no wrong decision if it's informed decision.
Book 1: Orgasmic Birth : Your Guide to a Safe, Satisfying, and Pleasurable Birth Experience
This book explains the theory and history: Why natural birth is naturally not so difficult, why it has become difficult lately and how to make it less difficult again.
It was the first book that I read about the topic and it made me feel really calm about the whole thing, fear was gone. I knew what I wanted, but there were not enough practical details for me.
Book 2: Active Birth : The New Approach to Giving Birth Naturally
This book is more practical. There is again a short explanation of theory in the first pages (may actually be sufficient for anyone who wants to focus on practise) and lots of ideas what to actually do.
Some of it worked well for me, some didn't - every body is different.
I suspect that there may be more recently published books that are equally good. If you find any, please don’t hesitate to share with us at the comments.
