Sometimes, I think that we all used to be such awesome kids - fearless, honest, curious and happy. What has happened to us that we became grumpy adults?

Our daughter goes to a small alternative school.Some of you may be sighing because you think that she may not get good enough education. Let me explain:

There are many kinds of alternative schools. Some are really bad and some are really great. We’ve chosen the one where are teachers who understand the idea about supporting kids to learn when they are ready. They learn what they want and when they want. We actually moved 1000 miles straight distance because we liked this school.

As you probably have understood by now, I’m a big fan of changes in our education system. I spent significant part of my life at education system - it was lot of stress. I actually became sick from all of the pressure. And I don’t remember much of what I had learnt! I put so much effort in it and it was so much useless.

I admit, I spent the most boring lessons at school secretly reading under my desk - about what I really liked and what I really wanted to learn. And that’s the stuff that I still remember. Every time I really wanted to learn something, I was in a turbo mode - I sucked the information in like a sponge. It was extremely effective. On the other side, my teachers and parents spent hours trying to teach me what I didn’t care about much. It was exhausting and difficult for all of us. And then I forgot most of it.

Did you have the same experience at school? Most of people actually do! There are lots of studies suggesting this problem.

Obviously, it’s difficult and highly political problem to change such a big system… The first reaction of people is that they are grateful that the education that they got. Please don’t get me wrong. I consider education extremely important. That’s exactly why I think that it’s very important to change it. As it is, it’s not the best that we can do. It’s limiting us as a society. My point is that we can get better education (to have wider/deeper knowledge and experience) with lower cost (less fear and pressure, more time to relax). How?

There is not much science behind the selection of the stuff that is taught at schools. Some respected people got the job to put it together. And they did their best. The trouble is that each one of us is different. And when we are pushed to learn something that we don’t really find interesting, it costs us (and teachers and parents) lots of time and stress. And we forget it after the exam anyway.

Why is it wrong? Because we could spend this huge amount of time learning what we find interesting. It would allow us to get much better in it, to love learning and we would even have more time to relax - which is important part of learning too. We would feel better about ourselves - not being humiliated at school for know knowing something. We would be excited about new adventures instead.

Lots of people worry that, we would do nothing or only learn a very narrow area of knowledge. That’s not true. How can I know it? There are schools in the world that support this approach. For very long time (over 100 years). There is no difference in numbers how many kids get to university, how many are “successful” or not from a normal school. How is it possible? Because humans are naturally curious. Kids love learning - until we torture them at school by keeping them away from what they want to learn. Every person has a passion. If we follow that passion, it leads us to learning more.

If you want to learn more in a pleasurable way, check the movie Summerhill based on a real story. It’s available on YouTube for free, but the quality is not great. I’m sure that if you search your favourite streaming service, you will find a better version.

For example, let’s say that I become interested in computer security (true story of my self-learning). I discover that I need to understand computers. I need to understand security. I need to understand algorithms. So I need to understand math. Therefore I need to learn good English. I need to learn programming to be able to actually do something… I got accepted to a university not because I was sitting at school learning what they were teaching me. I passed the exams because I was reading books about math and algorithms under my desk during other classes. Things that were too advanced to be taught at secondary school, but necessary to get the “best” university.

Yes, I admit. I missed some history, chemistry and literature lessons because of that. But I don’t mind, because I don’t remember much from these lessons even when I was trying to pay attention. I have learnt later whatever I needed. I became a certified personal trainer - my biology and chemistry teacher wouldn’t believe her eyes seeing me how I knew all the muscles in the body and chemical reactions allowing our body to work during exercises. I hated this stuff during my secondary school. I had to learn it, but I didn’t really understand it and didn’t remember it. And later, when I discovered my passion for it, I was shocked how it all started to make sense.

Later, I felt a need to understand management and business. So I studied it. I read tuns of books and made some certifications to be an analyst and consultant. Later, I started to intensively explore economics and history. Me! If you told me 15 years ago, I wounld’t believe you! Most boring stuff in the world by that time. And yet, here I am, learning it now.

I also honestly missed understanding the Theory of Relativity few years ago. I bought a popular science book about it and I loved it. No problem. When my daughter was born, I strongly felt need to sleep and to keep her happy at the same time - that’s when I learned a lot about how children “work” physically and mentally. I read so many books, articles and watched videos that it’s not possible to count them. No need to force me to learn that 😅 And you already know my story how I have been learning the photography.

I’m absolutely sure that you have a long list of what you’ve learnt by yourself. Without anyone telling you to do it. Just because you loved it. You were obsessed by it. Maybe it was some kind of a sport or hobby. Maybe you loved eating good food and learnt how to cook. Maybe it was some kind of science or art. Maybe you are into philosophy. Maybe you’ve got really good understanding of current fashion, political situation or football leagues. And nobody forced you to do it. What is your story? Please leave me a comment!

Whatever we need in life, we can learn it. Of course that we still need some kind of education support. Someone who can teach us and guide us to learn when we’re ready. But each of us has different needs of learning at different time of life (not just childhood!).

We also need someone to teach us critical thinking. Each of us has a responsibility for our lives and decisions. We need to know with absolute certainty that if our boss says that we need to do something, we don’t need to do it - if we feel that it’s not the right thing. We don’t need to hurt others because someone says that it’s our job. That’s how a war starts.

Note: I actually wrote this whole blog before the current conflict started. Anyway, there wouldn’t be any war without solders not thinking about what they are actually doing and “just” listening to the orders, would it?

Kids from “freedom” schools are less likely to be controlled by various kinds of psychopaths and sociopaths, mass psychosis or dangerous “friends” - because they are taught to base their self-esteem on their own judgement, not to base their own value on judgement of someone else. They are critical and out of box thinkers, they have high morale and simply refuse do to what doesn’t make sense or hurts others (because it doesn’t make sense or hurts others!).

True learning is exciting, fulfilling, fun, making us proud and humble at the same time. It’s not staring at a board in a classroom and not understanding it, finding it boring and feeling stressed if I pass the exam.

Kids from schools where they are respected feel happier throughout their whole life. And they are as successfull academically, financially and personally as kids from “normal” schools. All with ease, no pressure. That’s our future.