I Was Such a Dork

About 8 years ago: I was finishing a weekly overview of the work progress with my boss. Out team (the one the I was responsible for) was doing well in terms of the work done. But, there was one issue. Some people from the top management noticed our team members having a coffee in the kitchen “very often”. They were spending “too much time” in the kitchen. They brought the “issue” to my boss to fix it. So she asked me to fix it - chain of command.

I was a bit surprised. I was thinking about it. It didn't feel completely right to me, but my job was to make the management happy. The next team meeting, I explained that there were some complains about time spent in the kitchen and asked my team to spend less time there to keep the management happy. I remember the feeling till today - it just didn't feel right at all, but I was not able to grasp the problem. I was doing my job - listening and fulfilling the orders of the management.

Today, I feel so ashamed that I ever did this. I’d like to apologise to everyone in the team. I was such an idiot.

What would I do today? I would tell my boss that if she is happy with the work done, the amount of time spent in the kitchen is nothing that she should ever worry about. None of her business.

She had no idea how much time did people spent working - many of them arrived earlier and left later or they were also working home at night. And we did great. Most of time spent in the kitchen was a very productive time of exchanging information, getting great ideas or simply taking rest to be able to focus to work.

The company paid us to do the job. It shouldn’t have mattered if we looked like working hard. What should have mattered was if we worked hard. And we did. More than that.

Well, I know better today. And I keep thinking how to help others to finally realise that each one of us has a responsibility for our own actions. If we’re asked to do something that we feel that is not right, we should not do it! Why? Because we’re hurting people!

That I’d got fired? Maybe. Corporations without employees can’t exist. And they know it. So it’s a way how to change our workplace. Simply set boundaries. Either the company changes, or you find a place where you will be happier. I was so happy to leave after couple more years anyway.

In my case, I hurt my friends and colleagues. I’d taken away their peace during their breaks.

It Can Be Worse

Sounds silly? Not important enough? Maybe. There are definitely examples that have much more drama. Take the Russian soldiers killing Ukrainian people - people who didn’t want to have any war. The solders are just doing their jobs. Does it sound more serious now? Or Americans separating children from parents on the Mexican border. Did they feel that they were doing the right thing?

When the pandemic started, there was one hour a day allowed to be outside for sport activities in UK. We went to a park with our 2 years old, the park was fairly empty. I put a backpack on the ground and we started playing with a ball. A police officer came to us and insisted that we either need to “move from point A to point B” (how the rules said) or we had to go home. The walk would have been OK, but playing with a ball was a problem.

It was absolutely ridiculous. But the police officer insisted. He was taking our freedom away from us, preventing our child a healthy development in a fresh air. It didn’t make any sense - we didn’t do anything dangerous. He was “just doing his job”.

This repeated several times during that spring and summer and going to park always caused me very high level of stress. I felt a responsibility to my daughter to take her to the park and allow her to play on a fresh air, but I was worried that we would get arrested for the repeated conflicts and our daughter would have been taken away from us.

Why??

There are so many examples from the pandemic situation where people’s rights were restricted by people “just doing their job”. I could make a list, but it would be too long and yet not complete. Instead, let’s focus on the WHY.

There are many causes why we force or hurt others as part of our jobs. And one is very significant - our education system. Since we’re children we’re taught to listen and follow the commands - questions and critical thinking are not appreciated. Silence and obedience are rewarded.

That’s why I think that I was not able to stop the management from bullying my team members (I still feel such a shame). That’s why people suppress the feeling of not doing the right think and hurt others. It’s programmed deeply in our minds. That’s why I think that we need to change our education system.

Few days ago, I was listening to a podcast of Wim How with Jordan Peterson. He mentioned something that Yeonmi Park answered to him when he asked her why did she think that people in North Korea lost their freedom. She answered that in her opinion it was that they were silent when they were supposed to speak up.

Please Think

I was born in communist Czechoslovakia. I was small when the revolution begun, but I remember a lot. And I read a lot. Freedom is fragile. We need to appreciate it and speak up to keep it. Each single of us is responsible for our actions and our freedom. Please think before you do, tune into the feeling of (not) doing the right think. It gets much easier with practise. 🙏